Tuesday, March 16, 2010
It's Quite Amazing
I spent a few nights with my father and stepmother in Bonita Springs, Florida, and during that time realized that in my father's mind, I will always be his child. While I am closing in on 39 years old, we still had the typical father/daughter struggle for power. I had friends in town, and one night thought I would go out to visit them in Naples (about a 20 minute drive from where we stayed). Well, that meant "borrowing" Dad's car, and driving home on the "dangerous" roads of Naples, Florida late at night. Mind you, it was 8:30pm when I was ready to go, and my father surprised me with his answer of "No" to my question of, "May I borrow the car?". It was right back to a high school moment, although my father and I did not live together during those years, so truly, this was new territory. I ended up calling a cab so I could leave the house, angry and frustrated with my father. My stepmother talked to me about it, and tried to tell me that it had nothing to do with me, but with his control issues that something might happen to his car and there would be no way home. He actually said, "You can borrow the car, but don't bother coming back if you get in an accident." I decided it wasn't worth it to me, as anyone could hit me anywhere anytime.
I managed to still have a nice time out with my friends, and decided I wasn't going to let him spoil my trip. I was cordial and pretended nothing had happened the night before. I suppose it let him off the hook a little easily, but I also wanted him to see how an adult handles herself. This was a few days ago, and we did spend a few more days together without incident, but no, I did not drive the car once. By the way, I slept in the grandchildren's bunk beds too. :)